Monday, September 29, 2008

searching for my sabbath

i am writing this blog as sort of an outlet (isn't that why everyone does?)
i was struck during my study of Deuteronomy this past week in CBS that we (sorry, stereotype of christians coming up) do not observe the Sabbath the way God intended.
i certainly do not REST in any way, shape or form, unless it is a quick nap on sunday afternoon.
no wonder i am so burnt out during the week.
i have nothing left in me to give my family, let alone God, on any day of the week.
sundays are usually reserved for the church scene (which is a big deal with 3 children under 5) and then i do the grocery shopping because taking those 3 children to the store just makes the trip a little more interesting than i would like. i leave them home to have 'daddy time.'
monday-friday. i am attempting to homeschool kiddo #1 while entertaining the other 2 darlings, as well as cooking, cleaning (i still am not great at that), doing the laundry (i have been known to leave the laundry in the dryer for up to 4 days), and then anything else.
oh, yes, i also work part-time on the weekends so that my husband can watch the kids without utilizing or paying for childcare.

so...where does God fit into my life? i am supposed to "Love the Lord your (my) God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength." Dt 6.4

i fall VERY short of this.
perhaps if i restored a sabbath in my life, i would be more inclined to love God with everything in me.
a part of me knows that when i fall in love with Him so completely, the rest falls into line...not easily, mind you. i am not so naive as that. but completely under His control. i long for that.

and so...i am in search of the sabbath

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