at our local homeschool convention i picked up a book i had heard about at a MOPS group 2 years ago called Passionate Housewives Desperate for God. i have only gotten a few chapters into it, and to be honest, i have to go back and do it again.
i am a skim reader, and this book is actually requiring me to focus on the words and really listen to the message.
lately i have been struggling with my sense of purpose. i have always worked outside the home and have felt like that defined me. how wrong i was!
but i let subtle views and working mommy talk pervade my thinking and sway my desires from God-driven to world-driven.
i was getting irritated with my children if they interrupted my "me-time." i was frustrated if i couldn't get on the computer and surf the internet at will. i was resentful of my husband getting "to leave the house every day and talk with adults."
did i really let myself get to this point?
how did that happen???
i stopped praying and talking to God on a meaningful level. oh, i would pray alright, but prayers like...'please let me get through this next day without screaming at my children!' not prayers acknowledging who God is and how grateful i am to have His mercy and Grace overflowing in my life.
i watched lots of evening TV and let the insidious message of advertisements and television shows color my thinking. it happened slowly. i allowed chatter from women who worked outside the home to foster envy in my heart because i thought they "had it all."
i don't think so.
although i am ashamed to even admit my shortcoming in this area, i know it to be all too real for a lot of women. Feminism has told us that staying home with our children is not an option. that we shouldn't be tied to our homes and husbands because that would stifle us. what a load of dirty laundry that is!
what could be more important than staying at home with precious little children during their most formative years?
what could be better than being the 'safe place' for my husband to land after a very long day at work?
what could be better than serving my God, the Creator of all, by serving my family?
laundry isn't mundane, it is a blessing!
cooking isn't mundane, it is a way to nourish little bodies!
checkers and candyland aren't interruptions, they are moments that will always be with me and an opportunity to talk about attitudes and heart matters.
i am so glad that i have been confronted with my selfishness in this area.
i have a long way to go.
i am not perfect.
but i am being made more aware of the need to serve God by serving my family first, with an obedient heart.
obedience, we tell our children, is doing things all the way, right away, and with a cheerful heart.
i would do well to take my own directive and happily obey God's mandate to be a helpmate to my husband and instruct my children in righteousness.
happily, and prayerfully, and maybe even passionately!