Tuesday, March 31, 2009

tuesday's torment

i do not have a great relationship with my mother. or my father. or my sister. it has something to do with the fact that i believe in Christ. i think it is a disappointment to them. see, i have become this stay-at-home-mom. i got my bachelor's in 1995 for nursing, and went into the air force immediately after (the AF paid my way through school). i disappointed my father when i decided to get out of the military after four years. i disappointed them both when i decided to marry a man without a degree. and i REALLY disappointed them when i told them i was a christian and wanted to raise my family according to a biblical worldview! whew ... and...homeschooling..you gotta be kidding me! see, my sis teaches in the public school system and saw it as a personal affront that i was going to teach my own children. surely i am not qualified...ahem.

don't get me wrong. i love my family. they really aren't bad people, just misguided and not saved. if i hadn't started following Jesus, things would be different. i would be in the military still, probably with a kid or two and they would be attending public school and i would be working full time as an RN, with a master's degree and a 6 figure income.

and i wouldn't be happy. i would still be searching for the love that only Jesus can give. i would maybe even be divorced, because i am not exactly the easy-going person who just rolls with anything. it takes a super-special man to hang around me and not go crazy (...thanks, babe!).

so, i choose to be happy. i choose to go crazy with my kids on a daily basis. we may even have another one just to even out the odds...i like even numbers :) i choose to meal-plan and shop the cheapest deals. i choose to not have cable or dvr. i choose to work only one night a week so that we have enough to pay the bills. i choose to homeschool my children so they get one-on-one teaching and so we can have the freedom to go to the zoo when the crazies aren't there! i choose to put my God first, my husband second and take care of my family. i choose to be a helpmate to my husband.

and i am happy. blow-me-down, jump for joy, lovin' life kind of happy.


Laura Lou said...

I know this road only oh-so-well, except most of my family is now dead and the rest only giggle behind my back. Expectations...let's pray ours are pleasing to Him.

Bethanie said...

Amen to that.

Help Meet in the Making said...

Hey Gin,
Nice to "meet" you! I love this post! It pretty much says exactly what God has taught me over the past few years--that my calling to be a wife and mom is far greater than any job I could do as a nurse. I can't wait to be a stay at home mom and we are planning to home school our (future) children too. I love being a nurse, and I too once thought I would go back to school to get my MSN and possibly even a PhD in nursing. I never would have dreamed God would show me a much better plan He has for me!
Thanks for the comment. I added you to my blog list. :)